Thursday, April 30, 2015

Happy Birthday Thomas

My main squeeze since 1970------and the 46th birthday I have shared with him, he just called and he is on his way home already, a very light day---i am pretty sure we will go out to eat for either lunch or dinner,   I hope he has a wonderful wonderful day!! 


Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Knitty Wednesday

 Changeling Shawl, definitely not blocked yet 

hats for March April and part of May--i
got caught up!! 

Knit On!!!

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Ten Things I did last Week

This is the theme of the week----I wonder if I can come up with 10 other then the obvious, eat drink and sleep  and of course knit and watch Young and the Restless. But I will give it a try!!!

  1. Ordered Tom's birthday gifts---he will be 63 this Thursday and since he does not read my blog it is safe to tell you I got him a HUGE box of Lindt White Chocolate Truffles
    and Star Trek Voyager Season 2, I have my eye on a large rosemary plant too, next door to the diner I go too and if it is there Thursday I will pick up that too. 
  2. Ordered new summer curtains for the living room and dining room---nice and white, should let in lots of light, with the winter ones still up it looks dark and dingy in here. 
  3. I rearranged some of the knick- knacks and framed photos in the living room and dining room trying to make it look a bit more airy. 
  4. I actually returned to the land of doing dishes, while I was sick,
    Tom took over this too but since I am definitely feeling better I got my hands wet, and did some dirty dishes. 
  5. Finished a shawl, got caught up on my charity knitting etc but more on all of that tomorrow. 
  6. Went out to dinner twice with Tom ---that was nice, definitely makes a person feel more human, we went out last night too (just to the diner---nothing extravagant --less then 20$) but that is this week not last week. 
  7. Tried some new rooibos tea my cousin Lori sent me, She sent several samples and they both brewed the perfect pots of tea,  I really enjoyed them but noticed they don't sell them online.
  8. I boxed up Gwen's birthday gifts, but Tom hasn't been home to mail it yet, waiting on line in the post office is not on my list of current strengths. 
  9. I took less naps but I still went to bed fairly early. Falling asleep is not very hard but staying asleep is. 
  10. I fell in Love with Ed Sheeran and his song--"Kiss me under a Thousand Stars", just wonderful and fits Tom and I so well. 
Wow I did it  I came up with 10 things!!!! 


Monday, April 27, 2015

I am sorry

I will share further reflections on Thursday's post on indifference. I am apologizing for being judgmental and for possessing a sense of entitlement.  While I feel that indifference is still a malady in this world I may have been too hasty in directing it to my own situation----that is where being judgmental and feeling entitled come to play and as a rule I try not to be either, they don't sit well with me. In an effort to find justification for those who have not been there for me like I would have hoped I generalized their absence with indifference without ever knowing the real reason. That was so wrong of me.

 My return to good health is a slow process, I spent most of the night wondering if I was having a heart attack and truly not knowing how to handle it. Especially since I never felt the first one, what I was experiencing then and last night was similar to a panic attack that I have been experiencing for years. I also had a rough time yesterday with regulating my body temperature. I do go to the doctors again tomorrow so I guess we will see what transgresses then.  He is a new doctor to me, so I am already anticipating some anxiety over the visit. 

The weekend was very quiet, we were going to the ocean yesterday but I just wasn't up to it, so I sat outside and knitted and that is where I seemed to pick up the chill.  Tom bought more plants for his garden and spent some time out there with that. We of course watched golf in the afternoon.

  We made tentative  plans with Debb Chad and Columbia on Saturday night to go to Alabama for Columbia's high school graduation on the 29th of May.  I need to get to be 100 % well so we can make it this time.

 This coming weekend we are looking forward to a visit with our newest Toddler--Miss Maisie, who is now walking.  Way to go baby girl!!!KNIT ON! 

Friday, April 24, 2015

Little thoughts and Eye Candy Friday

next week I will share further reflections on yesterday's post on indifference I will apologize for being judgemental and for possessing a sense of entitlement.  While I feel that indifference is still a malady in this world I may have been too hasty in directing it to my own situation----that is where being judgemental and feeling entitled come to play and as a rule I try not to be either, they don't sit well with me--but that is for next week, today is Eye Candy Friday and I truly want to keep it light and pretty so everyone goes into the weekend with happy thoughts.

Today's eye candy are yarn oddities, I hope they bring you a chuckle or even pause for thought.


Thursday, April 23, 2015


this post is not directed to any individual, I am blessed with a loving caring family and friends but it just a general sense of  abandonment that I am dealing with, who knows it may even be a part of my recovery. 

It isn't exactly selfishness but I really don't know what it is called.   I have observed may people and for the most part the way they have been raised, the Golden Rule and all, respect your elders, speak truths, lies come back to haunt you, if you have nothing good to say don't say anything at all, etc.  I am talking about all age groups here,  older adults (older then me), people my age, our children, their children etc. At what age does the forget how I was raised--- this is my life and I will do what I want attitude kick in? It seems that it is different in every situation but it seems to happen to almost everyone.  The lack of respect for others in this world is snowballing exponentially and it breaks my heart.  I realize people want to do what makes them happy, what gives their life purpose and meaning but why does it have to mean distancing yourselves from others in your life.  People that love you and miss you and who suddenly find their lives empty and bereft, My illness was a learning experience in human nature.  In the hospital people seemed to care, the doctors, the nurses, the aides, the pulmonary techs, the physical therapy techs, even the cleaning ladies were known to rub a shoulder and say a prayer for your return to health.  When I got home the visiting nurses were the highlight of my life, but alas the hospital dismissed me so I must be better, the phone does not ring, the inquiries into my health have stopped and I am left feeling lonely and depressed, self absorbed and anxious.I have even been asked not to talk about my ordeal any more because it upsets them!! Sad but true. Now that I am no longer being cared for by strangers I have become a burden. Its like Cat Stevens "there are bills to pay and planes to catch---we'll get together then, you know we will have a good time then"  but then never comes.
 Sorry for the sad post today, I am just alone and depressed about it. KNIT ON!PS> Ria the reason their is no picture of Changeling is that it is lace and needs blocking before you can see anything in it at all, I did finish it yesterday and hope I can persuade Tom to block it soon, he is working Saturday so maybe Sunday. Today I will move on to charity hats, its time! 

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

It is Wednesday so its Knitting

I am working on a shawl called Changeling by Boo---it has 4 colors and an annoying 3 X 3 stitch, I thought at first it was because I didn't have lace needles that it challenged me but I got them and its still giving me fits and starts, its all in shades of purple and it will be beautiful but for me it is dragging.
To off set the misery I made a mat for my dining room table in cotton and crochet

I also made an adorable little fox, they truly intrigue me as I mentioned yesterday. He still needs eyes and a nose.

And I made a vest called Plain Vest by Pickles

also on the needles, a table runner started last January, a shawl Morticia started last August, a shawl called Madison started in March and the Noro circular shawl started in March, I call it Noro  but is is actually in Queensland llama, it just came from the Noro book


Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Ten Totally Random Thoughts for Ten on Tuesday

No more at home nursing care----I have mixed emotions, it was nice having someone stop in and check my vitals and the company was pleasant too but the insurance company said enough is enough. Now if my lungs would get the hint and start behaving I would be golden

Being outdoors this year is a big plus, loving the freedom of just walking out the front door and sitting outside, who knows what will happen when summer comes and kids are out of school but right now it is quiet and just plain nice

Tom is gardening---he has a nice big spot to play with and he is taking advantage, he put in a new rose bush, pansies and marigolds and rosemary, thyme, basil and parsley. We still have sage that keeps re wintering, and two other rose bushes, he still has room for more

Adult Color Books---love them, both of us do, we have Johanna Basford's best selling Secret Garden and her newest the Enchanted Forest.  Really enjoying being creative although the artist Tom is much better then I. 

Foxes----I am currently obsessed with knitting them (and coloring them) ----don't have a clue why, but I put a bunch  of Fox patterns on my Wish List on Ravelry because I want to make more.

Chicken and Waffles----last night I just had to have them, so we went to the diner and I ordered a Belgian Waffle and an order of chicken fingers, Combine them with some butter and syrup and it was really delicious. 

Another food obsession is cold cereal----the eggs in the hospital were some of the worst I had ever tried to eat, absolutely horrible, so cold cereal and yoghurt were the only other option so now for lunch almost every day I have Honey Nut Cheerios with fresh fruit.   I still need eggs for breakfast, so I eat two breakfasts every day. 

Connection----Tom and I have always felt deeply connected, even through the rough spots.  One night last week he called on his way home and we discussed dinner, After we hung up I thought I should have told him to get me some black and white cookies (entenmanns are the best) but I didn't want to call him back while he was driving.  When he came in with the groceries, right on top of the bag ---the cookies.  Then again on Sunday, we talked about dinner and I said get whatever, I would be happy with chicken or pork. In the back of my head I was thinking of Ree Drummonds Crash Hot potatoes, but again just didn't want to persuade him into something he might not be interested in.   He came home and started cooking, I didn't even ask him what he decided on, I knew it would be good.  When he brought me my dinner it had chicken tenders cooked in lemon and olive oil, carrots and Crash Hot Potatoes----that man knows me too well. 

I was very surprised last night to find out I knew a song Tom had never heard of.  "It's all about that Base"---I hardly listed to music, he ALWAYS has the radio on, and he had never heard it before. 

I don't have a clue what to suggest for dinner tonight. I know he will call soon but my mind is a total blank, I know not chicken,  Two nights in a row was enough. There are so many foods he can not eat because of his BPH---spaghetti being one or I would request that. 


Thursday, April 16, 2015

Thursday Briefly

VNA came this morning, I am having some tightness in my chest, my blood pressure is rather high, and I have a temperature, not the direction we want to go in.  My other vitals are good so she doesn't think it is the heart but the pneumonia not wanting to let go. 

Thought I would share the finished bird with you:

 I think she is cute!!


Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Wednesday is for Knitting

It took me a few days to get back into the swing of it, but as always a few moments browsing Ravelry and all I can think about is what I want to knit next. 

When I was admitted to the hospital I had about 20 rows (decreasing rows) to go on my Cha Feel Shawl, but this visit to the hospital was just not the time for knitting, Last Tuesday, after I was home I picked it up and had it finished with ends woven in and single crochet trim in about an hour and a half.  I start Boo Knits Changeling Shawl and had Tom pick me up some cheap yarn in oranges for a bird per the request of my 13 year old granddaughter Gwen.  (I still have Madison shawl, Morticia Shawl and a table runner on the needles but.............).  Since then I have knit a little bit every day. I have half a wing and two feet to make for the bird, Quite a bit on the Changeling but I am already eyeballing a few other projects too.  And I am woefully behind on my Charity hats, I don't think I have ever slipped up like this on my charity commitments. 

Here are some photos----remember the shawl isn't blocked yet, that will take Master Blocker's doing, so only he and God know when. 

The bird is Rebecca Danger's Bob the Blue Footed Booby in 2 shades of orange, some yellow and a rainbow varigated with extra orange since it is all knit with 2 strands held together.

What are you knitting??


Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Ten on Tuesday---10 every day delights

what a great topic and so appropriate for a person who suddenly finds themselves taking a moment to smell the flowers and truly appreciate the life around her. 

  1. Flowers---i have never ever seen a flower that hasn't made me smile, if I could do one thing it would be to purchase a new bunch every week just to always have them around me
  2. Tea-
    ----I just adore Tea, hot cold iced, black, green white and rooibos.  I wasn't put on any caffeine restrictions after the heart incident but I usually confine my self to one black tea in the morning, and then rooibos, herb or decaf for the rest of the day.  I have these huge Christmas mugs that I use all year round and usually combine flavors to come up with my own concoctions. Then I have my pretty mugs for that savory small cuppa that I enjoy when times are a wee bit tense.
  3. My mugs,  some are floral, some are knitting related ---I just love them and wish I still had this mug rack that I had back in the late 80's early 90's.  It was an old carpet sample case which held one mug in each cubicle beautifully---I also had a second one, twice the size that held my collection of knick knacks
  4. My yarn stash----just pawing through it makes me smile, I love discovering something I forgot I bought , I love knitting with quality yarns on quality needles, patterns that are well written yet challenging.  It is the highlight of my day
  5. My Kindle---I love that I can keep buying books (and sometimes getting them free) and not have to worry about were to put them when I am done. I have had it for 3 years now and use it every blessed day. Its a basic one, no bells and whistles but I have the computer for all of that, and in this day and age where we keep buying bigger and bigger TV's why would I want to watch on one the size of a 5 by 7 note card?
  6. Chocolate--
    --I don't eat a lot of it but that one savory, sweet dark chocolate bite makes everything better, and if I get to combine it with tea I am in my own special heaven.
  7. Maisie----she just makes us smile so much our cheeks hurt, she is the sunshine in our lives and one of the easiest things to find delight in, even my curmudgeon of a husband turns to jelly with just a glance at one of her photos.
  8. My faux fur throw that Tom gave me for Christmas, it is so soft and so indulgent, even when I am not cold I want it close so I can stroke it, he has bought me many many gifts in the 45 years we have been together but this is one of the Top 5.
  9. A husband that willingly and lovingly cooks,  for a while I felt guilty that he worked all day and then came home and cooked but cooking for him is like knitting for me----his stress buster of the day.
  10. An apartment with no stairs, I really love this place, noisy neighbor aside, thank goodness she works so it isn't always noisy, I can truly function easier here and that is a delight everyday. 

Friday, April 10, 2015

My world Right Now

savoring:  the one glass of caffeine tea I am allowed these days
watching:  I get out of bed to watch the soaps, and some TV with Tom each evening, I missed the DoveKeepers while I was in the hospital and I had been looking forward to it 
reading:  Still on RaeAnne Thayne's Cowboys of Cold Water Creek Series   On book 12 and have one more after that. 
knitting: An orange bird for my granddaughter Gwen who was 13 last Saturday. Which bird was up to me so I chose Bob the Blue Footed Booby, in 2 shades of orange, yellow and a variegated with orange in it. I am also starting Boo Knits Changeling and still working on the Noro Circular Shawl (although to be honest it has been a few weeks since I did anything on it)
wearing: An over sized black big shirt and black and grey flannel lounge pants, its all about comfort but yes I do have on a bra! 
choosing: Yarns from stash for the Boo Changeling and beads for the lace section

enjoying:  the quietness compared to the hospital but I miss the companionship of having people checking on me, monitoring me and taking care of me
processing: the fact that no matter how sick you get real life goes on and I have to pay bills and finish up the taxes today so Tom can mail it all tomorrow. 
anticipating:  a visit from Miss Maisie and her folks this Sunday as we celebrate Easter a bit late. 


Monday, April 6, 2015

we all pee---except Mom!

mom---you think of that lovely special woman who is either beaming from ear to ear because she is so proud of you --her special off spring or she has that scowl that clearly says  "What did you do", which ever she is Mom, Always perfect, always there and always full of love.

after all, she gave birth to you---the first little darling didn't want to come out, so we will use the salad spoons (forceps) and we just may have knicked up your bladder a bit in the process.  The second special delivery decides he wants to enter the world feet first trampling over everything that gets in his way including your bladder and our third precious bundle decides your bladder is such the perfect pillow that she will hibernate in your womb and be 5 weeks post gestational or very very late.

the years go by---a laugh here, oops a trickle, a cough there, okay maybe that was a gusher, You and those pads you swore you would never wear again become re-acquainted and you discreetly hide your problems from the rest of the world.

In the blink of an eye you are 60---how can that be????Your precious ones have little ones of their own so they now know Pee happens.  One day you are admitted to the hospital with pneumonia, that ever wrenching coughing that reaches all the way to the bottom of your feet. You are doing everything necessary to get better and get out of this place and you have a heart attack, nothing is going right, Visiting hours are going on, hubby is there and daughter #2 and you cough and cough and flood everything, you are mortified as you try to get to the bathroom and an aide comes to change the bed. In what you are sure is hours but is really only minutes the nurse stands triumphantly with dirty sheets and pads, the patient is tucked fresh and clean in the bed, the husband looks on thinking I can use this the next time she complains about my farting and the daughter is thinking, maybe one child is enough, do I want this to happen to me and in walks the son.  He who commands the attention of the entire room just by being, and he didn't have to see that his mother pee's---until someone notices the trickle from the bed to the bathroom door!

Everyone Pees.


Sunday, April 5, 2015

health update

hi---been a while, but its been a rough week, realized last Monday I couldn't do this sick thing on my own, called my sister, she called an ambulance and by 3 PM was in the ER, was admitted --after a cat scan, chest xray and tons of blood work made it to my room in telemetry (monitored) by 10 PM with pneumonia, Tuesday was a wash, could not tell you what went on, wednesday was told I was improving and promptly responded by having a heart attack. Back to bed, tons of medicines doctors, noise etc. Came home about 4 yesterday afternoon, slept about 10 of the first 12 hours home, still very tired and maybe a bit depressed and discouraged. And no knitting has not occurred between IV's in both arms and very little coherent thinking I have not even thought about it have TOm screening phone calls etc, talking on the phone is a measure in futility for me as I get very hoarse quickly and have much difficulty breathing, Happy Easter to you all

Knit On---someday